Nicole Williams
52, childcare business/trainee therapist. BSc Geog, ACII, MIPD, MA Employment Strategy, PGC in Media Practice and Secondary Ed. HR in Intl Finance and Development, incl Learning Manager, UNDP Kabul.
Location Wirral, Merseyside.
Activity
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Freedom to choose what and when to eat, what to wear, when to sleep and rise, where to go, how to spend our money, who to socialise with, what to do with our property, whether or not to attend to our own hygeine and when, our right to choose whether to take risks, whether to drink alcohol and smoke, whether to drive and use machinery, whether to agree to...
-
I faced a similar situation with my Mother. She had been told by the consultant she should not drive but wanted to continue until DVLA told her. I qualified as a Chartered Insurer and know there is a legal principal in insurance law that requires people act "In the utmost good faith". My Mother knew from her consultant that her eyesight had diminished to the...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I am Nicole. I work with people with mental health issues including dementia.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I think an online option would lift barriers to participation around distance, cost, time, time off work, respite for caring responsibilities, and. to an extent, fear.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I hope we will see better public education so people with dementia can participate safely across society, and don't become as isolated as they currently do. Peer support for families with members with bvFTD would reduce isolation and enable families to share tips - we have seen this work well with families of people with challenging behaviours from autism....
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Extremely important to know background. People are so much more than their diagnosis.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I practice gratitude and also try to look for the opportunities in difficult situations - I am a positive person by concerted effort and habits I developed.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Already made the changes
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I don't think there is enough coverage of any sort about dementia in the media I use in UK. We need a National conversation about it, using the appropriate language, so that we can raise awareness of current issues and also the massive projected increase in people living with dementia, so we can start planning. This is an issue impacting dignity and human...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The Modimed diet!
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
A diet rich in wholegrains, and a wide range of vegetables and fruits, plus oily fish, seems to be the most nutrient dense and therefore protective of mental and physical health
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I eat porridge milk cheese and bananas every day. Of the remaining intake, 80% is a variety of fresh or frozen vegetables, fruit or nuts, around 10% carbs, 10% protein, mostly as eggs or oily fish. My gut health is good!
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Geography - I live in North West UK but am from a very mixed heritage family. I have travelled extensively and previously lived and worked in London, Cape Town, Kolkata, Xi'an and Kabul. I think my exposure to microbes in diverse environments around the world has contributed to me maximising my gut biota and my overall immunity. I rarely become physically ill,...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
In UK, the Food Standards Agency uses the Healthy Eating Plate. Working with children I found this visual representation of a balanced healthy diet very helpful. We had the poster up next to the dining table and discussed it often.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
My family has a medical history of stomach problems like diverticular disease and cancer, so I avoid ultraprocessed foods, alcohol and sugar, and instead eat whole grains and vegetables as much as possible, limited meat, 2 portions of oily fish each week, and drink tea coffee milk and water, only.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Physical activity and sleep can both be addressed by most people without a cost barrier
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The tax system can be used to fund economic and community development initiatives to reduce inequalities
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
“… a state of well-being in which every individual realizes his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community”
(WHO 2019, p. 47). - I love this definition. The last phrase about being able to make a contribution to her or his community is so... -
Nicole Williams made a comment
Good basic introduction - keen to know more about behaviour activation.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Waiting lists and the cost of private therapy can make talking therapies unavailable when they are needed most. This is where self-help comes in. Family and friends can assist by scheduling time to discuss and complete the sections of the workbooks with their loved one who is struggling.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I think both, plus social prescribing would be most effective of all. Social connections and activities that spark joy can be both healing and protective of mental health in the long term. I think there should be a lot more education on the importance of that as a third and complementary route to mental and emotional wellbeing and resilience.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I am familiar with the PHQ-9 and GAD7 from my counselling training.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Exhaustion. Lack of enjoyment of usually enjoyable things. By contrast, Deepak's depression was characterised by lack of confidence and negative self-talk.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Hi I am Nicole from UK and I am interested in the course to be able to help people in my family and community and work
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Activation levels and shame were new to me. The material about creating trauma informed organisations and communities was pure gold. Neuroplasticity gives us hope.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Brilliant presentation. What resonated for me was whether you are on the fast or slow track is down to early childhood environment, and that, due to neuroplasticity, moving to a more benign environment later in life can rewire the brain, to expect security and predictability, which in turn would increase the likelihood of slow life path behaviours and...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Post traumatic growth - that's my hope.
-
@KimM Liverpool - same. Entire city based on migration, but its existence is rooted in slavery and exploitation.
-
Our area is built on migration and we have received a large number of refugees. We need to not make assumptions about the experience, including the trauma experience, of those we serve. We need to ensure we treat each as an individual and continue to actively listen, acknowledge and respond based on the individual.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
At an organisational level, having focus groups with service users and having at least one service user trustee would be a good start. Preparation for meetings to ensure the service users have a sense of agency and can exercise choices will be really important. Relates to flattening the power differential and making the service about respectful enablement...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
This is about flattening the power differential between the person delivering and the person receiving the service. The facilitator should ensure the entire group agrees boundaries to maintain safety, and the outcomes, and should deal with any disruptions to them, on behalf of the group.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
He has all the competencies, and he is a great role model - would give others hope that they can turn it round as he has. Powerful.
-
Nicole Williams replied to Martin H
Thanks for sharing this Martin. I am in UK. I'll spread the word. It is much-needed, especially in communities like mine.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
A warm smile with eye contact. Thanking them for coming and saying you are there to help them. Asking if there is anything you can do to help them feel this is a safe place in which they can share. Introduce yourself - name, role, background. Ask same about them - "Good to meet you X - can you tell me a little bit about your hopes for this meeting today?"...
-
Nicole Williams replied to Kiera S
@KieraS I really like "is there anything I can do to make you feel more comfortable or safe to open up in this space?" - I will definitely use this. Thank you.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Underpinning the entire approach at an individual person to person level, is respect for individuals - unconditional positive regard. In terms of organisations, for me, the phrase that stands out in that video, is "Do no harm". If only all organisations could have that as a central principle.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
It is important for service providers to be aware of and sensitive to shame in both staff and service users because otherwise policy and practices can trigger shame and result in shame cycle behaviours - withdrawal, avoiding using destructive behaviours such as substance misuse, attacking self, attacking others. All of these shame behaviours - whether in staff...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The presentation on shame competence in policing, within the shame lab site, is especially helpful. I found the "step inside the circle" video working with shame amongst incarcerated men particularly powerful. Thank you so much for making this material available - extremely impactful, thought provoking and practical.
-
Really great long form vid with Dr Tom Brunzell. Thank you!
-
@HannahBereznicki Thank you - I loved seeing this - very helpful.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Taking a school as an example, I would hope to see a reduction in disciplinary points, detentions, referrals to SLT, fights etc. I would hope to see higher levels of attendance and fewer cases of anxiety based school refusal. I would hope that pupil surveys would show higher reports for feeling school is a safe place, for feeling it is safe to share emotions...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Really appreciate being able to read the SAMHSA document on the concept of trauma and guidance for a trauma informed approach. It occurs to me that the peer support could take a form that mirrors 12 step programmes, and the organisation could commit to provide rooms for meetings of peers with trauma stories.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
To me a safe person is a person who is open and responsive to my disclosures about my responses - my emotions and behaviour, regardless of how rationale or irrational they might seem. The response I would hope for is active listening, acceptance, curiosity, empathy and support.
-
Nicole Williams replied to Kiera S
@KieraS "I think much of time (myself included) individuals are drawn towards professions such as social work, psychology, policing, etc. because we want to instil some type of safety into others that maybe we felt we have lacked or was ripped away from us in the past." So true. Whilst lived experience can be extremely valuable in all roles involving...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
There needs to be better understanding that negative/unwanted behaviours usually indicate unmet needs for safety connection and reassurance, or something else, rather than being a fixed indicator of character. Behaviour is communication. Organisations could run trauma informed training and weave trauma informed practice into codes of conduct, role...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The course structure, content and delivery is absolutely excellent, and I would highly recommend it to everyone. This week is the first time I have understood the relationship between trauma, shame, reactivity and attachment styles. For the first time I feel hope for healing from trauma, through attachment. I am looking forward to next week.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Trauma and shame can lead people to be hyperreactive, catastrophise, expect to have inadvertently failed, expect criticism and rejection, expect the worst of others. Cara displays trauma response to the situation by going into fight mode. She is hyperreactive - indicative of an anxious attachment style. The case study describes her catastrophising and thinking...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Fred deactivates, Josh hyperactivates. Fred's attachment style seems to be avoidant, and Josh's anxious. The style of activating is a coping strategy based on attachment experiences and trauma. The way their Mother compares them and comments that Fred doesn't cause drama, indicates that she prefers Fred's style of activation - detatchment - as she doesn't have...
-
body - trauma impacts the body according to Bessel Van Der Kolk
mind and emotions - trauma and shame impact these
family and kin - often a source of trauma, including through intergenerational trauma
community - again, often a source of trauma, due to norms of abusive behaviour and poor unresponsive relationships that can cascade down the generations. Shame... -
Nicole Williams made a comment
If not met head on, trauma and shame responses could be highly disruptive in any organisation. Organisations could use the following strategies. Emotional literacy development programmes. A stated culture of sharing emotions, role modelled from the top to the bottom of the organisation. A policy of consistently normalising and validating expressed emotional...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
This also explains why intergenerational trauma occurs. Trauma changes the reptilian part of the brain and the person prioritises their own survival above all others. Parenting is always stressful, so a brain that has experienced trauma and prioritises its own survival in reaction to stressors, would make for unresponsive parenting, and develop an avoidant...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Responsiveness to one another, particularly to emotional distress in group members, seems to be the key. In friendships teams and romantic relationships, deciding as a group to have high responsiveness to one another, and consistently putting in the concerted effort to have a high level of responsiveness to one another, could change the attachment style of...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Hyperactivating behaviours indicate inconsistent responsiveness in the primary attachment figure, leading to development of a disorganised attachment in early life, taken into adulthood. Deactivating indicates unresponsiveness in the primary attachment figure in early life. I am clearly a deactivator. In organisations, I think the strategies may be promoted...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The typical reaction to separation is distress - grief and mourning. The connection evolved to increase chances for survival.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I am hoping to learn more about how to repair relationships after rupture has happened under the influence of earlier traumas.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I have done several trauma courses and this one is by far the best - the videos are pure gold. Thank you so much for making this available. Excellent.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Substance misuse is usually rooted in trauma and the urge to escape memories and thoughts. We know Cara was already using before the birth of her baby - this indicates a history of trauma earlier in life. The behaviour of the boyfriend is extreme but it is unlikely that it is a one-off - unprecedented - because his friends just turn a blind eye, unsurprised....
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
According to Dr Siegal's model, Josh has "flipped his lid" - the 3M year old reptilian area of the brain at the top of the brain stem, which is responsible for survival, has fired off and overpowered his integrative prefrontal cortex, meaning his behaviour is being driven by instinct rather than rational forethought and he has attacked his abuser, with bad...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
My family have been refugees and IDPs and also expelled from a 3rd country 2 generations back in WW2. I also volunteered at The Olive Grove refugee camp in Lesvos, and also worked in Afghanistan with many who had grown up in the camps in Pakistan as refugees from the Taliban. You never get over these experiences. In his 30s my grandfather was on the road...
-
Nicole Williams replied to Alison P
Absolutely loved the extended interview! Thank you so much.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I follow the work of Dr Jess Taylor and agree that the DSM doesn't recognise the impact of trauma on mental health and behaviour, and that therefore interventions indicated for issues identified vs the DSM may not work where the is trauma or trauma in addition to a valid DSM condition.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I am in UK, in a highly disadvantaged community. I see the evidence of this all around me, in high levels of substance misuse and addiction, violent crime, imprisonment, domestic abuse and child abuse - reflected in an unusually high proportion of children removed to government care.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Wounds heal. Past events cannot be undone. Viewing trauma as the wound to the psyche, opens the possibility of recovery.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I recognise the Hyper and Hypo aroused states from the children and young people I work with, and from amongst friends and family living with trauma.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
That's a great film on the ANS, with hope for recovery from trauma.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
During trauma, the hippocampus switches from laying down memory to pumping out cortisol, which prevents us from feeling pain. This means the recorder in our brain is temporarily switched off whilst the traumatic event is occurring and it can make it difficult to recall exactly what occurred. The subconscious feeling part of the brain, the amygdala, is still...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The trusting relationship can bring the sense of safety back, and counteract the heightened threat sensitivity in people who have experienced trauma, that triggers the trauma response and 4Fs.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The survival instincts - the 4 F responses - are in the brain stem - represented by the wrist - the 3 million year old centre of the brain. The thumb is the limbic system - where emotions happen and meaning is made. The cortex - represented by the fingers - makes maps of the world and how it works, and the prefrontal cortex - the last joint of the fingers - is...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The video from Luna Dolezal was especially helpful - I replayed it several times so I could pick up the full richness of the content.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I have done several trauma and neurodiversity courses but have never learned about shame in relation to them. I found the case studies and the videos very helpful.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Cara has experienced living in a family in poverty, and witnessed and experienced domestic abuse, and witnessed substance misuse.
along with her siblings, Cara has been verbally abused and this will have impacted her self esteem and brought feelings of shame and a sense of rejection. The ACES will have put Cara's Amygdala on a hair trigger and likely to... -
Nicole Williams made a comment
Acute or type 1 trauma. The event was a fatal car crash. The experience of the event was that bpth boys saw the same. The effect on the boys was different, however, as Josh relates his own family to the way he perceives the accident - his reaction is to see it as a sign that his own parents could die in the same way. This relating to external events in...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Our children's hospital has a separate low sensory waiting room for those who need it, and our local cinema, toy shop and supermarket all run time slots with lower lighting and lower sound.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Lifelong feelings of insecurity may lead to people pleasing behaviours, and hypersensitivity and reactivity to any sign of precarity in life. Existing in a state of alert or hyper-arousal - higher base levels of cortisol and adrenalin. Can lead to harmful behaviours as a means of distraction from the fear, such as substance abuse.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Such events change our perception of what will happen and make life seem unpredictable and precarious. How much we then suffer, and for how long we suffer, will depend on the protective factors in our lives. For example, if there has been a strong secure attachment throughout childhood, a protective factor, then the person is more likely to be able to cope...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Feeling unsafe is the common theme
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Cara has been triggered by one or several factors in the situation. Her past experience of trauma has made her Amygdala - with its survival behaviours of fight flight freeze or fawn - exist on a hair trigger that can, when activated, overpower her prefrontal cortex that provides rational thought, planning, consequence consideration. She has gone into fight...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I am doing this course because there is trauma in my family and amongst the people I work with and I would like to be better equipped to support them. I too have experienced several traumas during my lifetime, so I hope the course will provide some insights into my own trauma responses.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
1. We need to consider prejudice re body shape alongside other types of discrimination.
2. We need to work with young people to help them form secure identities based on multiple factors beyond appearance.
3. We need to be cautious and aware of how we talk about appearance - others' appearance and our own
4. Body image is playing an increasing role in... -
Nicole Williams made a comment
Puberty is the big one, but any major changes in life could have an impact.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I have worked with people with ASD whose diet is restrictive, and this can affect their weight, shape and health, and also impact when and how they hit puberty. Sensory issues can also impact whether young people engage in sports, and what sports, and to what extent, and this can lead to weight, bodyshape and health issues.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I was struck by Rhea saying her skin was never going to look that way. Once again, I think the work is about building identity that is based on a far wider range of factors, so the young person understands they are not defined solely by their difference and that they have a multitude of qualities alongside that bodily difference.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Where the child's culture over-values body image as a measure of value of people, they will be more concerned during transitions, for example joining high school, that others may use body image as the main determinant of position in the pecking order. If the child doesn't fit the "ideal" and thinks their new high school peers are evaluating them solely on how...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I would do the identity work described above with the young person and extend it to discuss that people who only evaluate appearance are taking an over-simplistic view and missing the multidimensional nature of human beings. We would discuss the long term impact on them, the way they behave, and their life opportunities, all of which would be negatively...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I have encountered fixation on weight in both male and female adolescents. As I commented above, working proactively on identity that is based on factors beyond body image would be protective of their mental health through life.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
What does this illustrate about the role of peers in body image, mental health, and behaviour?
Where peers focus on appearance - body image - this is a strong influence, and can lead some young people to over value that factor in overall identity
List the different pressures influencing these young people’s body image.
Media pressure is the biggest... -
Since 2010 I think very few young people in UK have access to medication they need for their mental health
-
Body image concerns in children under 6 surprises and worries me.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I hope to learn how to be a positive influence on the CYP I interact with vs body image.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I will be doing work on identity that sets body image in the context of all the other qualities that make up a person. This will set body image in context and in proportion and hopefully protect against over-focus on appearance.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I think family attitude to bodies plays a big part.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The biggest protective factor is her parents' encouragement of a positive balance in health and happiness. A risk factor is that she seems not to have been prepared for the changes coming with pregnancy and age. More work could be done in schools and and in ante natal classes to prepare people for the changes involved - temporary and long term. If Sadia was...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
Choosing weight as the factor, I think we could work with young people on prejudice and stereotypes and how evaluating someone only for their weight or general appearance is as heinous as other forms of prejudice. We should all acknowledge that there is more to a person's value than their body, and we should not be prejudiced against others or ourselves based...
-
The dip in satisfaction in late middle age is a surprise. I am 55. Professionals who work with children and young people should work with them to develop identities based on a wide range of factors beyond body image - to properly note and value all the qualities of character, knowledge skills and experience, that also contribute to making the person who they...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
How we respond to the changes in our body in later life will be informed by the level of significance given to body image when we think about our overall identity. If we have always taken a holistic approach to identity, we are likely to suffer less as our body deteriorates, because other factors of our identity remain or are even strengthened with age -...
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
The concept of internalised idealised body image is most helpful to me. It is a form of prejudice and if we don't conform with the ideal we can experience disgust disappointment and self-hatred alongside paranoia and shame about our perceived deficits vs the ideal.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
In my family, co-sleeping during early childhood helps with attachment. Reading together every day at bed time as a routine also fosters attachment. Community volunteering together, attending church together, gardening and country walks together, travel together, running fundraising events together, all help foster a strong attachment.
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
I love this:
'good mental health is characterised by a person’s ability to fulfil a number of key functions and activities, including the ability to:Learn;
Feel, express, and manage a range of positive and negative emotions;
Play a full part in forming and maintaining good relationships with others;
Cope with and manage life’s challenges, changes, and... -
Nicole Williams made a comment
Balance, positive, proactive
-
Nicole Williams made a comment
We live in a misogynistic society in UK , where women are sometimes valued as accessories to men, and more so since the rise of social media, filters and idealising of a Barbie clone look. We are pounded with messaging towards that visual ideal that is valued above other characteristics, so it is not surprising that women are more concerned about appearance...
